There are 2 mistakes that one can make along the road to truth,
Not going all the way and not starting

~ Hindu Prince Gautama Siddharta, the founder of Buddhism, 563-483 B.C ~

The Honesty Path

How Are Those Lies Working Out For You, Really?

How many lies do you tell yourself each day? How’s it working out for you? It’s a funny thing, honesty. One conjures up memories of their childhood and being taught not to tell fibs, to always tell the truth even if it may get you into trouble. We then start to learn and are encouraged to tell small white lies occasionally if it means protecting the feelings of a loved one. Or that it’s okay to bend the truth a little as long as no one gets hurt. Through childhood we also absorb how our caregivers and guardians tell lies (big or small) to help them through their daily lives, which then starts to create conflict with what they tell us about the importance of truth.

It’s no wonder then, that as we mature some of the biggest lies we tell are to ourselves. Over time if we continue these charades we can become so disillusioned as to what the actual truth is. We can lie out of habit, and we can lie out of fear. As addressing the real truth is too daunting, perhaps painful. The truth may go against who we think we are and who we portray ourselves as to the rest of the world so it seems easier to continue living that lie. 

Perhaps there is a common lie we tell (or act out) to others. The closet eater who in the presence of others eats seemingly healthy, complains about not being able to lose weight but then goes home and begins a binge. Over time they may truly begin to believe that they DO have a healthy diet and become honestly confused and frustrated as to why they can’t lose weight. The more the lie is told, the more it is believed. 

Perhaps lately you’ve been feeling a little blue and withdrawn from your normal activities. You tell yourself and those around you that everything is okay, you’re just tired. But you have a gnawing feeling in the pit of your stomach that it’s more than that. Could it be depression? No, lying to yourself and others is a better alternative than admitting you may need some help. 

Common lies we tell ourselves and others:

  • I haven’t got time for exercise (bunnies, you always have SOME time for exercise!)
  • I’ve been really busy at the office (you’re working long hours to avoid an uncomfortable situation at home)
  • This top new? No, I’ve had it for ages! (one lie I am guilty of)
  • I’ll only have one drink tonight (if you know it’s not going to happen, don’t say it)
  • I’m just a nervous, anxious person. It’s who I am (the stigma of mental health can cause people not to seek appropriate help which could dramatically improve their lives)

There are so many lies we tell ourselves that appear to make life easier for us, but they don’t. Some of the lies may really seem like truths, but to an observer it’s blindingly obvious that all is not as it seems. The lies can be seen through, and the only person getting hurt in the process is the one trying to do the deceiving.

Life can get better when you start untangling all of the lies that have been spun. Being truthful with yourself may be difficult at first, but it’s a great step towards feeling free and happy. Let’s all stop the little lies.

Stay honest

xx

 

            


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